sarahanddennisspongebob hel

sarahanddennisspongebob

 

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sarahanddennis

What can you do to help this sweet girl be orphaned no more????

http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/2011/08/because-it-is-our-problem.html

The Visit to the Orphanage

This was a hard day.  We chose to go to a city in Piper's province to visit an orphanage and Maria's Big House of Hope.  Piper's orphanage was too far away and not an option to visit so we tagged along with some other families to see their daughters' orphanage.  Dennis and I decided ahead of time that only I would go in the orphanage because it may be too traumatic for Piper.  Even though it was not her home orphanage, they all look so similar and we were so afraid she would think we were leaving her there.  Two weeks before her adoption, her home orphanage (Pingdingshan Social Welfare Institute) showed up at her wonderful foster placement and took her to get her passport completed.  She was uprooted from a place of love and comfort and placed into a huge orphanage with strangers with no preparation.  We also know that China feels it is good to disrupt attachment...taking children from positive foster placements and putting them in the institutional care so they are not so sad when their adoptive parents come to receive them...no thought of the poor children in that process.  I would much rather have held and consoled a crying baby than my poor little girl who had no affect and such a blank stare when we received her that first day.  Anyway...I've digressed...more about our visit:

We took a 2 hour drive in a small bus to Luoyang and Piper immediately shut down.  She was doing so beautifully prior to this - bonding, laughing, playing.  She just kind of went limp on the ride and slept a LOT and it wasn't even close to nap time.  We realized the last time she took a long car ride was when the orphanage worker brought her to Zhengzhou to meet us.  Did she think she was going to be handed off again...quite possibly.  We got to the orphanage.  It was a huge building on the outskirts of the city. 

                                                                          Front view:

Side View:

Dennis hung out outside with Piper and unfortunately she was upset the whole time, alternating crying with withdrawal.  I of course was inside so didn't know.  I along with 3 other families went inside and what immediately struck me was the silence...eery silence.  There were 635 kids living here and we heard nothing.  No laughter...no tears....no playing....nothing.  The guide took us up to one of the floors and we saw some adorable little boys.  They all ran to the gate and held up their arms saying "mama, mama, mama"....talk about breaking your heart....mine felt like it was being chipped away in little pieces.  Why can't I just take them home with me?  Why is adoption so hard?  Why can't I just hold them and tell them they are loved?

We looked at some other rooms and apparently the children were all eating lunch so they were empty but they wouldn't let us see them eating.  We saw what they wanted us to see, which was disappointing but I'm not sure my heart could have handled seeing much more...and this was one of the "good" orphanages.  We did see some babies napping and the room just seemed so stark and lacking comfort...no blankies, binkies, stuffed animals, or mommies and daddies to rock them.

Two babies/toddlers to every crib:

After the tour (if you want to call seeing 4 rooms of this enormous building a tour) we met with the orphanage director.  He was very kind and appreciative of us adopting.  The conference room where we met was very nice - air conditioning, pictures on the walls, nice furniture, and bottles of water at every seat.  It made me ill to be treated like this when there were precious babies the next floor down living so minimally.  They even gave us all a gift, which again was a genuinely kind gesture but I wanted to send them all back and take the money to buy some toys for these sweet little ones.  Even people on the other side of the world know how materialistic we Americans are.  I. Hate. It.

We then headed off to Maria's Big House of Hope and I was feeling "hope"ful that it would be a happier place.  It was amazing!!  Just pulling up and seeing that big building painted blue with clouds on it made me smile.  We were a little nervous to take Piper in but thought we'd give it a try.  We stepped in the doors and immediately felt JOY.  It exuded happiness and love and Piper could feel it too.  She got down to play on the floor and even smiled for the first time since leaving that day.  The children were beautiful and happy, free to move about the building.  The staff were loving and gentle, just as a mother would be.  So glad we were able to experience this gift.  For those of you that don't know, this was started by Stephen Curtis Chapman's orphan ministry after his daughter Maria died.  If you haven't read Mary Beth Chapman's book "Choosing to See" do it!



  



Registration Day

Today the adoption became official!!  They wait 24 hours after you receive your child before making it official so that parents have time to spend with their child to make sure they want to keep him/her.  Yeh right!  Not even a question for us (and I'm sure most adoptive parents).

So, we went back to the registration office to receive our official documentation.  This was the same office we were at the day before...the same office where our children's lives changed forever...the same office where these scared little babies were just dropped off into arms.  No thought is put into how this might affect the child and even re-traumatize them.  I know some of them thought they were being dropped off again to someone else.  A couple of them started crying when we entered the building...heartbreaking : (  We made a special effort to go to a different area of the big room than Piper had been in before...the play area!  Thank God she did great and even spent some time bonding (playing and laughing) with daddy:

The presentation of our legal document:

She's ours : )))))))

Gotcha Day

What an amazing day!  We went down to breakfast this morning and you could just feel the excitement from all of the families.  I would go from moments of smiling to moments of tearing up just thinking of seeing Piper Jia Yu after a year and half wait.

Here are some of the families going into the registration office, the place where we would receive our children:

Another picture of 2 happy couples, anxiously awaiting their daughters' arrivals:

She's here!!!!!!!!  She was the first in our group to arrive and I was talking and didn't even see her come in.  Then I heard Dennis exclaim "Jia Yu!"

She didn't want to come to me at first, so I bribed her with a cookie:

You can see the scared look in her eyes.  My heart aches for what she is going through right now:

But just a couple of hours later...we got our first smile (and they've been plentiful ever since):

Day 2

We arrived in Zhengzhou today and it's kind of surreal to be back.  When at home, our time spent here seemed like a distant memory but now that we're back, all of those memories came flooding back.  We're not in the 'hood this time but staying at the Crowne Plaza so that part is a bit different.  We are grouped with 13 other families and they are all wonderful.  It's so amazing to hear about each one's journey and how God has hand picked each of our children for our families. 

Tonight we were thrilled to have dinner with Clay, Pam and Xiao Qing.  Because of them, we met, fostered, fell in-love with, and are now adopting Piper!!  They are an amazing family that run Swallows Nest Children's Home:  http://www.swallowsnestzz.org/  If you are looking for a place to make a charitable contribution to, please consider them.  They are saving parentless children's lives every day!  We also dined with another adoptive mother, adopting from Swallows Nest and Clay and Pam's friend, Rhonda.

Tomorrow is "Gotcha Day".  So excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Day 1

We are on our way today!!  We decided to drive to Chicago and leave from there (it was a $1000 cheaper than flying out of Grand Rapids).  We got there in plenty of time and they gave us better seats than we originally had so it turned out to be a good flight (if 12 hours in the air can be good).  We arrived in Beijing a little late but there was a driver waiting for us.  We got to bed at 2:00am (2:00pm US time) and had to get up early to catch a flight to Zhengzhou.  It wasn't too hard to get up since we were so excited to get to our daughter's province!!

It's Finally Happening!!

The time is finally upon us!  We are leaving July 8th to be reunited with our daughter.  October 31, 2009...I remember that day so well.  It was the last day we spent with Piper.  I spent the whole day holding her...letting go only to let Emily, Dennis and Benji get a few hugs in.  Lots of tears were shed and such uncertainty filled us after she left.  We sent a letter with her, along with a bracelet, pictures of our time together, and Emily's baby blanket that she selflessly gave Piper.  At that moment we honestly didn't know if we would be given the honor of parenting her but wanted her to have some memories of our time together, no matter where life took her. 

We are so thankful that God chose us!!!   What a looooong journey but Piper Jia Yu, you are so worth the wait my beautiful girl!  We are so glad that God kept you safe and healthy and in the loving care of the Swallows Nest nannies while we were apart.  We will see you soon!!!

Happy Mother's Day

Dearest Birth Mothers,

If it were not for you, I would not have the pleasure of celebrating Mother's Day with Benji and soon, Piper.  I cannot describe the feelings of love and gratitude I have for your selfless gift of love.  I pray this day finds you at peace with your decision and God gives you a sense that your babies are doing wonderfully and are an absolute blessing to so many in their lives.  Happy Mother's Day birth mothers!  May you remember the day your babies were born, the sweet smell of their skin and the warmth of their snugly little bodies.  We love you and pray for you daily.

Thank you Vanderbilt

God wants this little girl home with us!  We were blessed again unexpectedly by a donation to our adoption fund.  The staff at Emily and Benji's school, Vanderbilt Charter Academy, http://vanderbilt.heritageacademies.com/, pay money to wear jeans on Fridays and then donate the money to a charity.  Well, this time we were the recipients!  This school has been a blessing to us in so many ways!  Thank you Vanderbilt Charter Academy!!!

Such a Sweetheart

We just got these new pictures.  Isn't she the sweetest thing ever?!



We were so blessed a couple weeks ago by a visit to First Baptist Church in Murphysboro Illinois.  Their orphan ministry (A Gift of Hope) invited us to come and share Piper's story and speak about the plight of orphans in China.  We felt God's presence so strongly there and were incredibly humbled by their generosity.  We were blown away by these people who felt so passionately about orphans and who entrusted us to parent 1 very special little girl, Piper Jia Yu.  Thank you ....A Gift of Hope, for partnering with our family to bring Piper home!  We can't wait to come back and show her off to all of you!!

The family

The YUMMY pancake breakfast to raise money for more orphans

Benji made lots of new friends

Singing with Nicolette; I'm so blessed to call her my friend.  Did you notice Piper on the big screen? We had a slide show during our song.

Part of the AMAZING Gift of Hope team

Presentation of the donation.  Dennis and I are holding back the tears.

Can't hold them back any longer.  Full of thanksgiving!!!



Words cannot express the gratitude we feel to all of you who have prayed and donated to help bring our angel home. The outpouring of love and well wishes for our daughter is amazing!! Friends from all over the world have pitched in to help this one little girl have a chance at life. Long lost high school friends, co-workers from years ago, parents of babies I used to work (ok, play) with, other adoptive families, friends in China, and family members have all helped reunite us with our daughter. We are almost half way to our goal!!!

You are all a very important part of this journey and we consider you a part of Jia Yu's extended family.  It gives me goose bumps to think this little girl, who was abandoned and left on a stool on a busy road in China, with no home and no family, is soon going to have a home and an enormous family (you all) full of love, life and happiness.  Thank you so much for you love and support.  We can't wait for you to meet her!!

New pictures!!

She's sitting up now!!  Her report that was sent says she is so happy all of the time.  We can't wait to see that smile in person and kiss those cheeks.

Bittersweet

We received an update and some great pictures of Piper Jia Yu today! We all felt happiness mixed with sorrow. How wonderful it is to see her so happy and see how she's changed and grown but how sad to think about all of the "firsts" we have missed. Poor Benji didn't believe it was her at first because she has changed so much. Emily couldn't get over all of her teeth! I'm not complaining though; I'd gladly receive pictures of her sweet face everyday if I could but it also makes me want to get her home all the more. Here's the latest photo...can you stand the cuteness?????

Camp Geneva Rocks!

Benji recently went to a week long day camp at Camp Geneva - (www.campgeneva.org). He had a blast making new friends with campers AND counselors, swimming, playing games, and singing songs about Jesus! At the beginning of the summer I didn't even think this camp so close to home would be an option for a child with Down syndrome but a friend from church, whose own kids went there said she was sure they'd welcome him. So, I contacted them and they said "We'd love to have him!" They have a special needs coordinator who got to know him before he came and let him come out to check it out the week before he started. The counselors welcomed him with open arms and once again Benji demonstrated his "rock star" (as he likes to call himself) qualities as he waved, hugged, and high-fived them everyday. This was inclusion at its best and in my opinion, a little glimpse of heaven. Thanks Camp Geneva!!

Here are a few photos of the week and no, I didn't hang out and stalk him, they were taken by his counselors.

Introducing Piper Jia Yu

I think as I was typing my last post, I got an email saying we had pre-approval! Yippee!! I'm so excited to share with you our beautiful daughter!! Here are some favorite pictures:

1 Step Closer

We are 1 step close to bringing our baby home! Her file is now in the US and we have accepted her referral. We completed some paperwork to be sent to China with our intent to adopt her and once they grant us the pre-approval, I can officially introduce her! The adoption agency asked that we not publicly announce anything yet so I'll hold off on pictures until then. Many of you have asked how long it will be until she's home and we really don't know but are guessing it could take anywhere from 5-7 months.

Now, for the hard part...finances. This adoption will cost around $20,000. Ridiculously expensive??? You betcha. Worth every penny? Absolutely. Some very kind and loving friends have asked me to set up a paypal account so they could contribute to Jia Yu's adoption. If you feel a tugging on your heart and would like to join in this venture with us and help one more orphaned child be united with her forever family, we'd humbly accept your donation. Thank you.

If you could commit to pray for our family, we'd love that as well. If you just enjoy following our journey and rejoicing with us as we move forward, we'd also love that! Please do not feel obligated AT ALL. For those of you who know me well, you know I hate to ask for money and this is really uncomfortable for me, but I also want to acknowledge that there are some wonderful people out there who have orphans and/or children with Down syndrome on their hearts and want to use this as a way to minister to them. Thanks to you all for your continued support. We are so blessed.

It is Well

It has been forever since I've updated this blog!! We've been so busy with our new life in Michigan that I haven't had the energy to update. So if anyone is still reading this, here's a little recap of what's been going on in the past couple of months.

We moved to Holland, Michigan in December and absolutely love it here! It's hard to be away from family and friends but hey, it's a heck of a lot closer than China!!

Emily and Benji have adjusted well and are in a local charter school. Emily skipped 3rd grade and is excelling in 4th grade(even tested up to 5th grade in some subjects!). That's what she gets for having a genius as a father :) Benji is doing well too. He's fully included and we didn't even have to ask for it!! They just do it at this school!! It's great to be in a school with an administration that understands special education and best practice. We miss our "Moberly","Fleace", and "Harper" (Benji's previous teachers)but still keep in touch with them.

I am working for Head Start as a mental health specialist. I work with kiddos that have behavior or developmental concerns. I'm really enjoying it and love that I'm on a school schedule. I'm looking forward to Spring Break and summer vacation with my Em and Benj!

Dennis is working for Bethany Christian Services (Benji's adoption agency). He is the intake coordinator and also has helped them out with a huge grant.

Our house still hasn't sold. Ugh! There are now some issues with the renters' credit so please keep this situation in your prayers. We have to move out of our current rental in May and were hoping to buy a new home here.

Things are looking really positive for adopting our foster baby!!!! We now have an agency we are working with and they are working on obtaining her file. We have a ton of paperwork ahead of us but it is so worth it. We are so anxious to have that sweet baby back in our arms.

I'll update more later when we get official news about the adoption. Hopefully it will be soon!!

Preparing a Place

After leaving China, I've wrestled with whether we made the right decision in leaving our foster baby. Through my tears one evening, my very wise husband reminded me of this verse:

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. -John 14: 1-3

This verse rings so true with our situation. We have left China to prepare a place for our baby. Had we stayed in China, we would not have met the requirements to adopt from China. Crazy, I know, but we would not have met the income requirements. Our baby still would have been listed for adoption and we, her foster parents, would not be able to adopt her. This separation is temporary but our family is eternal.

All this being said, she still has not been listed for adoption and there are no guarantees that we will be selected as her family but we remain hopeful. We are doing everything we can to reunite with her. God knows the desires of our hearts and we pray every day as a family that she will be in our arms soon. Please pray for this with us!!

As for Benji, he is doing AWESOME!! We know we made the best decision for him. Despite being born in China, he is American through and through!! He has improved so much and his favorite thing to tell us is "Thank you home from China; I love you whole much!!". What a confirmation!

Emily is doing great too and though I feared she may fall back into the materialistic American culture, she has not. She is as sweet as ever and is such a generous, selfless little girl. We are blessed, very, very blessed.

The Broken Road

Our sweet baby's hands wearing the bracelets we got her. She kept 1 and Emily has the other.

Since deciding to move back to the states, many of our friends have asked what we felt our mission was in China. Why would God choose to send us there for only 3 months? The answer is simple...to meet our daughter. We went to China open to the possibility of adoption but had no idea that was to be our mission there.

In many ways, our road in China was a broken one. There were a lot of struggles but those struggles (our Northern stars) were what led us to our baby. We were happy to help out our friends at Swallow's Nest by fostering one of their babies so they could bring in more medically fragile babies. What we didn't expect was to immediately fall in-love with our foster baby. We bonded to her and she bonded to us so quickly.

Saturday was the hardest day of my life. I had to say goodbye to my precious baby. We spent the day soaking up every sweet moment we could. At one point we all sat on the couch just holding each other and it felt perfect, like this was the family God has intended for us. Our friend, the director of the foster homes, was so thoughtful and came to pick her up so we wouldn't have to go out and say such a public goodbye. Emily was sweet to give the baby her blanket, the one she grew up with. We all gave her a hug and kiss and told her we loved her. Dennis walked them out to get a cab and Emily and I just held each other and cried. After she left, my arms longed to hold her and my chest felt cold, I was used to the warmth of her body snuggled up next to me. I couldn't look at her empty bouncy seat and crib and Dennis was so sweet to put them out of my sight.

Our friend Clay said it to me best...."Many people who spend some time in China and go back home, leave a part of their heart in China but you are different.... you are leaving a big chunk of yours here." That's exactly how I feel, like a big part of my heart was left there. Our hope is that she will soon be listed for adoption and we will be selected as her forever family. This hope is what keeps us going and tempers the sadness and grief. Thank you God for blessing the broken road that led us straight to her.