1 Step Closer

We are 1 step close to bringing our baby home! Her file is now in the US and we have accepted her referral. We completed some paperwork to be sent to China with our intent to adopt her and once they grant us the pre-approval, I can officially introduce her! The adoption agency asked that we not publicly announce anything yet so I'll hold off on pictures until then. Many of you have asked how long it will be until she's home and we really don't know but are guessing it could take anywhere from 5-7 months.

Now, for the hard part...finances. This adoption will cost around $20,000. Ridiculously expensive??? You betcha. Worth every penny? Absolutely. Some very kind and loving friends have asked me to set up a paypal account so they could contribute to Jia Yu's adoption. If you feel a tugging on your heart and would like to join in this venture with us and help one more orphaned child be united with her forever family, we'd humbly accept your donation. Thank you.

If you could commit to pray for our family, we'd love that as well. If you just enjoy following our journey and rejoicing with us as we move forward, we'd also love that! Please do not feel obligated AT ALL. For those of you who know me well, you know I hate to ask for money and this is really uncomfortable for me, but I also want to acknowledge that there are some wonderful people out there who have orphans and/or children with Down syndrome on their hearts and want to use this as a way to minister to them. Thanks to you all for your continued support. We are so blessed.

It is Well

It has been forever since I've updated this blog!! We've been so busy with our new life in Michigan that I haven't had the energy to update. So if anyone is still reading this, here's a little recap of what's been going on in the past couple of months.

We moved to Holland, Michigan in December and absolutely love it here! It's hard to be away from family and friends but hey, it's a heck of a lot closer than China!!

Emily and Benji have adjusted well and are in a local charter school. Emily skipped 3rd grade and is excelling in 4th grade(even tested up to 5th grade in some subjects!). That's what she gets for having a genius as a father :) Benji is doing well too. He's fully included and we didn't even have to ask for it!! They just do it at this school!! It's great to be in a school with an administration that understands special education and best practice. We miss our "Moberly","Fleace", and "Harper" (Benji's previous teachers)but still keep in touch with them.

I am working for Head Start as a mental health specialist. I work with kiddos that have behavior or developmental concerns. I'm really enjoying it and love that I'm on a school schedule. I'm looking forward to Spring Break and summer vacation with my Em and Benj!

Dennis is working for Bethany Christian Services (Benji's adoption agency). He is the intake coordinator and also has helped them out with a huge grant.

Our house still hasn't sold. Ugh! There are now some issues with the renters' credit so please keep this situation in your prayers. We have to move out of our current rental in May and were hoping to buy a new home here.

Things are looking really positive for adopting our foster baby!!!! We now have an agency we are working with and they are working on obtaining her file. We have a ton of paperwork ahead of us but it is so worth it. We are so anxious to have that sweet baby back in our arms.

I'll update more later when we get official news about the adoption. Hopefully it will be soon!!

Preparing a Place

After leaving China, I've wrestled with whether we made the right decision in leaving our foster baby. Through my tears one evening, my very wise husband reminded me of this verse:

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. -John 14: 1-3

This verse rings so true with our situation. We have left China to prepare a place for our baby. Had we stayed in China, we would not have met the requirements to adopt from China. Crazy, I know, but we would not have met the income requirements. Our baby still would have been listed for adoption and we, her foster parents, would not be able to adopt her. This separation is temporary but our family is eternal.

All this being said, she still has not been listed for adoption and there are no guarantees that we will be selected as her family but we remain hopeful. We are doing everything we can to reunite with her. God knows the desires of our hearts and we pray every day as a family that she will be in our arms soon. Please pray for this with us!!

As for Benji, he is doing AWESOME!! We know we made the best decision for him. Despite being born in China, he is American through and through!! He has improved so much and his favorite thing to tell us is "Thank you home from China; I love you whole much!!". What a confirmation!

Emily is doing great too and though I feared she may fall back into the materialistic American culture, she has not. She is as sweet as ever and is such a generous, selfless little girl. We are blessed, very, very blessed.

The Broken Road

Our sweet baby's hands wearing the bracelets we got her. She kept 1 and Emily has the other.

Since deciding to move back to the states, many of our friends have asked what we felt our mission was in China. Why would God choose to send us there for only 3 months? The answer is simple...to meet our daughter. We went to China open to the possibility of adoption but had no idea that was to be our mission there.

In many ways, our road in China was a broken one. There were a lot of struggles but those struggles (our Northern stars) were what led us to our baby. We were happy to help out our friends at Swallow's Nest by fostering one of their babies so they could bring in more medically fragile babies. What we didn't expect was to immediately fall in-love with our foster baby. We bonded to her and she bonded to us so quickly.

Saturday was the hardest day of my life. I had to say goodbye to my precious baby. We spent the day soaking up every sweet moment we could. At one point we all sat on the couch just holding each other and it felt perfect, like this was the family God has intended for us. Our friend, the director of the foster homes, was so thoughtful and came to pick her up so we wouldn't have to go out and say such a public goodbye. Emily was sweet to give the baby her blanket, the one she grew up with. We all gave her a hug and kiss and told her we loved her. Dennis walked them out to get a cab and Emily and I just held each other and cried. After she left, my arms longed to hold her and my chest felt cold, I was used to the warmth of her body snuggled up next to me. I couldn't look at her empty bouncy seat and crib and Dennis was so sweet to put them out of my sight.

Our friend Clay said it to me best...."Many people who spend some time in China and go back home, leave a part of their heart in China but you are different.... you are leaving a big chunk of yours here." That's exactly how I feel, like a big part of my heart was left there. Our hope is that she will soon be listed for adoption and we will be selected as her forever family. This hope is what keeps us going and tempers the sadness and grief. Thank you God for blessing the broken road that led us straight to her.

Moving On

Here goes, I've been kind of dreading writing this post because it's embarrassing and humbling for me.  Our 12 month stay has turned into a 3 month stay.  We are returning in November.  This was an agonizing decision that we spent a long time trying to figure out.  There are a couple of reasons why we need to go back to the states (one of which we aren't free to discuss here).  The other reason is this: we agreed before we came that if we all weren't doing well, then we would re-evaluate.  Well, 3 of us are doing fine but 1 is not.  Benjamin just has not adjusted to this way of life and we fear he probably never will – at least not during his elementary years.  He has regressed.  All of the hard behavior work we and his teachers did last year has been undone here. Home education is almost non-existent as he will only do a couple things a day and they are on his terms or he'll refuse all together (OK that part hasn't changed much from KDG but still….).  He dislikes going out and having people stare and paw at him (can't blame him for that one).  We can't discipline him in public because, well, he's Chinese and we're not.  So his consequences are not always immediate like they need to be.  He cries "I want to go home!!" almost daily.  He's even packed up his suitcase a few times and tried to leave, saying he was going to get his ticket (for the airplane).

 

We made a promise to him, to God, and to his orphanage that we would take care of him, do what's best for him, love him through the hard times.  Only we can do that.  There are other people that will continue to do God's work in China but we are the only ones that can take care of our sweet Benji.  That was the deciding factor for us.  How can we continue to work with orphans if we aren't taking the best care of the 1 orphan God entrusted us with?  We definitely plan to stay involved with the kids here though, doing what we can for Swallow's Nest Children's Home from the states.  We wish the situation was different, but it's not.  So, we will move on from here for now and maybe someday we'll return.

 

Dennis will actually remain on staff with the school he's at.  They've re-hired him as an international consultant.  He will recruit American teachers, build partnerships between American schools, and much more.  They've also agreed to fly him back yearly to meet with them.

 

So, what's next?  Dennis will need to finish his dissertation, compiling all of the research he's obtained here and will also be working.  Benji will go to school ASAP!!!  I think we will have our Benji back after a few weeks of him being in a structured classroom with his 6 year old peers.  I will continue to home educate Emily and work a little on the side if need be.  We don't know where we'll be living yet; we're waiting to hear back on some job applications.

 

Thanks for all of your support throughout our little adventure.  See you soon.

 

Catching Up

So, I really haven't blogged and shared our stories as much as I had hoped to while in China.  There are several reasons for that – unreliable internet service, blocked access to my blog, an active little boy, and a new baby to cuddle with.  Our eyes have really been opened up here; we thought we knew so much about the plight of orphans in China before we came but now we know so much more.  There is so much to share but a public blog is not the place.

 

Dennis is coming along on his research and we have some preliminary plans for returning home and will share those in my next post (I promise!!!).  We just have some details to figure out first.

 

For those of you that don't know, we are fostering a 5 month old baby girl.  She is the most delightful little thing ever!!!  We don't know her story, why she was orphaned, but assume it's because she has Down syndrome.  She's not available for adoption yet, but hopefully someday soon she will be listed.  She is asleep right now next to me, lying in Benji's lap.  He insisted on covering her up with his blankie and putting his stuffed animal next to her.  This is HUGE considering how much Benji likes to share his things (never).  What a good big brother he is!!  It is the sweetest thing ever watching my 2 Chinese, DS angels laugh, play and snuggle together.

 

We went to the International Fellowship on Sunday and during worship I was brought to tears by this song.  As I was looking into our sweet foster baby's eyes it really hit me that He knows her name; He hears her cries; He will NEVER leave her.  We don't know what the future holds for this precious baby (hopefully it involves us!).  We are so blessed just to be a part of her life, if even for a little while.

 

He Knows My Name

 

I have a Maker
He formed My Heart
Before even time began
My life was in hands

-Chorus-
He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And hears me when I call

I have a father
He calls me his own
He'll never leave me
No matter where I go

Sweet Babies

Thanks to all of you who prayed and contributed money to Swallows Nest Children's Home for the surgeries of the 3 babies with Spina Bifida.  Nearly $6,000 has been raised!!!  Sadly, one of the babies did not make it out of the NICU but we rejoice that she is out of pain and now in the arms of her heavenly Father.  Some of your money will go to pay for her hospital stay and the rest will go towards the surgeries of the 2 others.  There is still time to donate, so please do so as you feel led.  Please go to Swallows Nest website for updates: www.swallowsnestzz.org

 

Love,

Sarah